by Josh
We had a two-weeker for last week’s Silly Superhero Situations, and it has been one of my favorites to not only read, but read the responses from comments as well! I appreciate all of the great feedback! Wolverine seemed to come out ahead last week, which I think I would agree with. Godzilla would probably try to burn him to a crisp, but that good ole healing factor of Wolverine will keep him a chugging along. Check out the results of the Wolverine versus Godzilla poll here!
But moving on to this week’s Silly Superhero Situations, we are going to move back to some villains this time around. Since Maleficent came out this weekend, I thought she might be a good candidate for this week. For those unfamiliar, she is the evil woman responsible for cursing Aurora in Sleeping Beauty. I figured for her opponent, why don’t we stick with the evil women of fairy tales and pit her against the Wicked Queen from Snow White and the Seven Dwarves. So what task would they be taking on? Well, babysitting of course! So, if you’re in a pinch, and you need a sitter for your five year old child, but the only two people available for you are Maleficent or the Wicked Queen, who do you choose? This one is going to be tough. You literally are choosing between the lesser of two evils!
With Maleficent, if we look at her strictly from the view Sleeping Beauty gives us, we really do not know what her motives are. She seems to be just being mean for the sake of being mean. So if she was hired, it would be hard to say what she would do. The good news with Maleficent however: If the child ticks her off enough, the worst that Maleficent would do is put a curse of eternal sleep on her, and that won’t even happen until the child is sixteen. On top of that, the child will have to prick her finger on a spinning wheel. Where in the world would you find an enchanted spinning wheel today? This curse is going to be pretty hard to enforce. Hopefully that is the only curse that Maleficent knows. And hey, the curse did make Aurora a pretty likeable person for the first 16 years of her life. This has to help get through those aggravating teenage-raising years. It might save a few gray hairs in the end!
Let’s say that your kid does prick her finger on a randomly found spinning wheel, what happens then? This could turn out to be a double win! Those late teen years have to be a pain to raise your child in. In today’s society, you have so much to worry about for your teenager: under-aged drinking, drugs, inappropriate internet interactions, Snapchat, and the list goes on! If your kid fell asleep at the age of sixteen, is that really so bad? And since it is “true love’s kiss” that wakes her up, that means she found the right man to be with, right? This whole curse might not be so bad after all…
So what if the Wicked Queen got the job? This could be a bit of a problem. First of all, the wicked Queen might spend all of her time looking in the mirror, making sure she is the “fairest of them all”. But on the plus side, it would certainly teach your daughter independence, as she would likely have to learn to take care of herself. Hopefully she would also see the crazy obsessive nature the Queen has over her own looks, and has a much better outlook on life and personal appearance. She might turn out pretty level headed in the end! Your kid would also turn out to get plenty of fruits in their diet and plenty of sleep!
As for the whole poisoning thing, this might not be a big deal in the end. As long as the Queen’s mirror tells her that she is the fairest of them all, I think your daughter would be perfectly fine! And hey, if your daughter did decide to flee because the Queen was getting a little too jealous of her looks, at least we know she would be in good hands when she ran into the dwarves.
P.S. If you vote and leave a comment, you can earn 5 extra entries in our November Loot Crate + Doctor Who T-Shirt Giveaway!
P.P.S. We will also be awarding 25 bonus entries in our giveaway to the person with the most convincing argument in the support of Maleficent, and to the person with the most convincing argument in support of the Wicked Queen! Josh and Violet will be the judge.
Click here to read our male vs. female perspective reviews of Disney’s Maleficent!
How anyone can vote against Maleficent, I do not understand. Mistress of All Evil.
ALL. EVIL.
This is a hard one. I mean, on one hand, love the idea of sleeping away the teen years. On the other hand, you’ve got potential poisoning and living with 7 strange old men.
However, I’m going to have to choose option D on this one. See, it doesn’t really matter who I leave my kid with, because my daughter would run circles around both these crazy Monarchs.
There’s no way the mirror would lie to the Queen and tell her that she’s fairer than my kid. My daughter would have her eating her own gorram poisoned apple out of depression from having no hope of ever being so fair.
Not even Maleficent can make my daughter take a nap when she doesn’t want to. If you ain’t her Mama, she’s not fraking likely to listen to you. I’d have to mount a camera in the house just to go back and lawl at Maleficent putting heads with my stubborn little girl. Go ahead, turn into a dragon. She’s watched How To Train Your Dragon 20 times. This week. You don’t stand a chance, Mally.
And that’s just 1 out of my 5. I’d have to hire ALL the Disney villains just to even the odds…
I would have to leave my kid with Maleficent. She just looks evil; so, my child would probably be too scared to misbehave. The Wicked Queen from Snow White has too many self esteem issues which is why she’s always looking in the mirror. I don’t want my child exposed to such shallowness as a role model. Also, it’s hard enough getting children to eat fruits and vegetables without being afraid they are all poisoned. With today’s kids obsessed with electronics, I doubt my child would be interested in going near anything as ancient as a spinning wheel. Therefore, my kid is safer with Maleficent.
Got to go with Maleficent, better clothes
Clearly Maleficent is the clear winner here, at least she wasn’t ever trying to kill Aurora.
Aurora was only in eternal sleep XD
Maleficent runs away with it.
I chose Maleficent. It would be like taking your daughter to a a baby sitter and the sitter putting them down for a long nap. It’s better than leaving her with a sitter that’s trying to give her a “healthy” snack!
We have decided to award Roxann, David K. and Stonie 25 bonus entries each for their thoughtful answers!
Good job on that Silly Superhero Situation.
I fell in love with Maleficent after watching the movie. In so-called reality she was a very loving person/fairy.
This is a hard one, and so close to home at the same time lol.
Seeing as I’m just getting into the horrible teenage yrs with my daughter. Maleficent seems like the winner here.
BUT seeing how my daughter already is, The Evil Queen could do her some good. And if all else fails, seeing how I really am a dwarf, I would eventually come home to save her. And either way she has to be kissed by Prince Charming to wake up, so Win Win all around.
I’ve gotta choose Maleficent….the green-faced Maleficent. 😀
I’m going with Maleficent. The Wicked Queen is driven by vanity, jealousy and vengeance. Even if her mirror said she’s the fairest, something else could make her jealous. I doubt Maleficent would even have to speak, she’s just scary (at first)- although my daughter has a speak 1st, think 2nd personality like me which could get her in trouble, although Maleficent may find that an endearing quality.
I go with Maleficent
I loved Maleficent and begged my husband to go see it 18 times!
The Queen got no love, so I’d let her babysit my kids. Hopefully she’ll stop talking to the mirror since the fact that no one else hired her proves that she is not the fairest of them all.
Maleficent
While I did not love the live action movie, Maleficent has ALWAYS been my favorite Disney villain. I wasn’t terrified of her in the same way I was Ursula (shudder), but she seemed to be more evil in a really sleek way. So Maleficent hands down.
I HAVE to cast my vote for Maleficent!!